I came home last night, deep in emotions and ready to type up a post… and then I decided to allow myself a bit of distance from the situation. I needed time to process my irrational fear (?) and unproductive reaction (paranoia?), so what you’re reading today is written by me after a decent night of sleep. It helped.
Before I dive in, let me start by mentioning that I had a super fabulous dinner last night at Bin26.

My lovely dates: Meghan and Kirsten

I love these girls! I ran with both of them before and there is something about a bond you build while you run, especially long distance. You pick each other up and motivate each other to keep going. I wish we had a chance to hang out more. I think we’ll try to make it happen after last night (and apparently our husbands/boyfriends have a lot in common too – think: Top Gear).
Bin26 is a gorgeous wine bar in Beacon Hill. I loved the clean + modern atmosphere with wine bottles decorating the space…. in expected:


… and unexpected ways (that’s a ceiling in the bathroom!!)

I started with a 250ml glass of Grosjean Freres Premetta Pinor Noir upon Kirsten’s suggestion. She knows wines and said this was one of her favorites. This was the best wine I’ve ever had in my life!!! It was fruity and smooth yet complex but not too sweet. I am really horrible at describing wines but I am telling you that this beats $100+ bottles I’ve had the pleasure to enjoy.

After a lot of indecisiveness, we finally decided to split a plate of cheeses and zucchini carpaccio. Fresh sourdough bread with EVOO came out as well. Perfect!

Selection of 4: Grana Padano, Pecorino Toscano, Taleggio di Malga, Gorgonzola Naturale

I am not a fan of gorgonzola (or any other blue cheese for that matter) but the other 3 were fantastic. I loved their diversity… cheese + wine is a fantastic combo!
Zucchini carpacio – zucchini ribbons drizzled with lemon vinaigrette + pine nuts

This was so incredibly fresh and flavorful. I really have to recreate this at home! What a perfect summer appetizer.
So we shared these 2 plates and then I decided to order an entree as my meal.
Cocoa tagliatelle with porcini mushroom ragout scented with nepitella

Sounds fancy, no? It was delicious. Very mushroomy though so it’s not for the faint of heart. I love mushrooms so I polished this off no problem
When the waitress offered a dessert menu, I didn’t hesitate. Yes, please. I’ll have the chocolate layer cake served with semifreddo

I was stoked to see cherries but the cake was not my favorite. It was soaked in some kind of liquor, which I suppose is appropriate for a wine bar but I didn’t care for it. Guess what? I still ate every bite.
On my way home, this is where it hit me – I was stuffed, uncomfortably so. This is also where my paranoia about what and how much I eat sunk in. Meghan only had the shared apps and Kirsten ordered a tiny tapa as her meal + a small biscotti that nearly broke her tooth so she only had a bite of it. These girls are thin and I am not. Yes, I’m healthy. I made a lot of progress recently in the self-acceptance department but nights like this give me perspective on my actions. I ordered last night like I would on any other night out. I treat nights like this as treats and of course accept larger portions than usual since of course I wouldn’t have an appetizer, entree, dessert + wine on a typical Monday night at home. But is that the right thing to do? Am I just fattening myself up slowly and giving myself a green light to do so in the spirit of “self acceptance”?
This is my “analysis” after a night of sleep. You can only imagine the less productive thoughts running through my head on my walk home. Of course I shouldn’t compare myself to others. I shouldn’t even presume I know the circumstances of other people. I think Meghan had plans for dinner with her husband later than night (makes sense why she’d eat lightly before that). Maybe the girls had giant lunches, maybe finances played a role in their decisions. The point is that I shouldn’t care. But I twisted it up and made myself feel bad. I felt paranoid about my own less than stellar choices and should have viewed them in vacuum without throwing what other people ate into the mix. Ok I think I’m done. I really did have an amazing time catching up with the girls. I just hate how unproductive thoughts creep in sometimes and ruin a perfectly fun night.
Other eats…
BREAKFAST

Green monster – silken tofu, almond milk, banana, frozen mixed berries + frozen spinach, topped with Zoe’s granola

This was the best smoothie I’ve ever made. I attribute it to lots of berries.
LUNCH
Everything but the kitchen sink salad – kale massaged with lemon juice and 1t basil EVOO, carrots, grape tomatoes, pickles, boiled egg, walnuts + feta

The pickles made the salad. I think I’m a genius for thinking of this.

SNACKS
Mid-morning:

Mid-afternoon:

What can I say, I love fruit + nuts combo
WORKOUT
A super sweaty 60 minute class with jump rope/weight intervals. Somehow I was able to keep up.
Do you ever compare your food choices to others’?
